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archive: july
welp, it happened. japan post as well as many other countries have completely suspended packages to the usa in response to the uncertainty of the tariff situation. no more imports for the forseeable future. what a mess and i can't believe people are still doubling down and defending their vote.
i'm still prepping for the con. right now i'm working on my final stickers and commission examples. the wifi situation never got sorted out unfortunately... the rentable hotspots at the local library are all t-mobile only and i thought i had found the answer to my problem with verizon's vision service but my phone is too old for an e-sim and my bf's phone is locked to his carrier. maybe in the future i will invest in a hotspot device but right now it's too costly to buy one just for a show i get into every two years.
last weekend was one of a first and last! on saturday i checked out a club i've been wanting to go to since last year. my co-worker was doing a dj set during a dance night so i invited some friends to come with me and it was so much fun! they also serve coffee there, so the smell walking in? incredible. i can still imagine the fragrance even now. it wasn't too busy either, the dance floor ranged from empty to spotty during our visit. i'll never forget the moves of the older gentleman whose looks i can only describe as "vampire dandy". those spins were hypnotizing. oh, and my friends totally teased me for buying a white claw. well, it IS a white girl drink, they're not wrong. truth be told, i'm always reminded of shayna every time i drink one, lmao.
we left the club pretty early, around midnight. one friend's meds were kicking in and making her sleepy while the other was hungry so we went to a taqueria close by my friend's apartment. it was so tasty and i had no idea this place is still open late, an order of quesabirrias was just what i needed to sober up.
the simple outfit for the night and the marshmallows i was tempted to buy at the restaurant. my socks were secretly matching with my bag!
on sunday we went swimming in a city pool for the last time of the year, it was bittersweet. i may not like summer but i love being in the pool! thankfully the hotel we're staying at has a pool and a hot tub so i can go swimming one last time at least.
oh yeah, something terrifying happened yesterday when i came home from work, i opened the door and the whole house smelled strongly of gas. my grandpa didn't properly turn the stove off! i couldn't believe how careless he was, and the worst part is this isn't the first time he's done this. he was apologetic of course and he didn't realize it was still on because he was working outside, but he does stuff like this all the time and it's so stressful. he really does need to be watched over like a kid. one time he accidentally made chlorine gas at the last house we lived in... this is why men live shorter lives i swear. i'm just so grateful no one got hurt and the house was fine and no fires broke out. wouldn't be the first time i worried about my grandpa burning the house down... and for what? the driest, hardest, most bland chicken ever that no one ate. i think my grandpa needs to be banned from cooking inside unless it's eggs.
on the bright side, my mom and her husband came over to help mount their big tv and gave us a futon for the back room. now it looks like a house and not a sad empty place!! i can't wait to really start decorating more after the con, and i don't care if my mom disapproves, i'm decorating for halloween. we watched kpop demon hunters in the living room with a plethora of snacks to celebrate the new tv. i can't wait to invite friends over!!
the reason why my mom gave us their stuff is because they're moving! my sister hasn't lived with them in years and that house was too big for only two people anyway. one more leak broke out and it was the straw that broke the camel's back, now they are in the process of selling their home and downsizing hardcore in preparation to move into a townhouse with lots of amenities available. i hope it all works out... moving is so stressful.
my sticker order needs to hurry up and get here!! i didn't pay $140 so it could get here AFTER the con, smh. back to work now... i'm working on a set of kitty butler love and deepspace stickers next! i got the summer sylus card, but i still want xavier... am i really going to have to open my wallet again? with the usa being shut off from imported goods, i might as well have one luxury i guess.
one week until the con. i say one week from today and not tomorrow because they needed me to work next thursday, which means after work i'll go straight to the convention center and pick up my badges so i can start setting up. i still want to finish two new sticker sheets and a few other stickers, a commission sketch set, and then my deco card commission examples. i'm not sure how much i can get done before then, but i'll just do what i can. yesterday i finished sketching one of the new sheets, i've been wanting to do a hamtaro sticker sheet for ages! i think it's turning out cute so far:
i also decided to sell some of my lolita at the con, just three pieces: a chinese brand op and two ap skirts. i don't really want to sell my cosmic skirt but i hate the way the waistband looks on me so i'm going to keep the accessories and try to look for the lavender jsk instead. then i'm also selling my letter doll skirt just because i got my use out of it and want something else, but one of the waist tie buttons popped off and i don't remember where i put it! the crazy thing is i always had the button at my computer desk and now when i finally need it, i misplaced it... i hope i can find it before the con. ap really sucks with buttons, i need to get into the habit of reinforcing them every time i get a new piece.
looking at everything i own, i did a pretty good job curating my wardrobe because it's all pieces i genuinely love and 95% Japanese brand to boot. truth be told, i'm not really interested in chinese brand lolita because there's 1. simply too much choice and too many brands 2. it's harder to track down secondhand and 3. it doesn't retain its value very well. If I wanted an affordable filler piece i would just go with a less popular piece or brand that's still japanese. that being said, i hope maybe i can find something to buy or trade at the swap meet... i haven't bought a new main piece in 2 years and i'm feeling the itch of wanting a new piece to wear.
i'm still deciding what i want to wear too! i still have my paula from earthbound cosplay that i finished gathering all the pieces for back in 2020 and never got to wear... actually, the dress and shoes are a little big on me now. i don't want to wear anything too uncomfortable since i'll mostly be sitting down at my table working, but i also don't want to repeat either of the dresses i wore last year at this con so it's a fun challenge putting together outfits! at least i know i want to wear toy parade for sure, i've been wanting to wear it for months now and haven't gotten the opportunity, i wish i had worn it on decora day honestly.
on monday after work, i went to a special showing of the original texas chainsaw massacre. believe it or not, i've never seen it! when i was a kid i was often subjected to horror films against my will whenever i went to visit my dad's side of the family but the name alone scared me so much that my uncle decided to not put it on and upset me further, heh. then there was the fact that at every cd/dvd exchange i went to, only the remakes and sequels were ever in stock.
i laughed, a lot... which i didn't expect at all. i had to google after the movie just to see if anyone else had the same experience as me and apparently tobe hooper meant for the movie to be a dark comedy, a fact that upsets a lot of hardcore horror fans who take the genre way too seriously. i'm not saying the movie wasn't scary or that i didn't enjoy it, but i'm sorry, i was laughing my ass off at so many scenes. i guess tobe hooper and i just have the same sick sense of humor or something. i have so much more to say but i'll save it for later. i really need to hurry up and work on my main site again so i can toss all of my media ramblings up there.
it's midnight. i was about to hop into bed, but i suddenly remembered i needed to transfer my clothes to the dryer and figured i might as well recap my day before i knock out. i had a full day! i woke up not really feeling like doing anything, especially because bean slept with me overnight and i didn't want to rouse her, but my grandpa got us tacos. it was so nice. he doesn't work anymore but he likes to go to the junkyard and scrounge around for whatever is useful. he's found me a lot of games that were long lost in between car seats over the years!
i ended up cleaning up the house a little bit while i printed and cut sticker sheets. i have 14 sheets so far, but i really want to make a pastel hamtaro one before the con. my printer is already out of magenta! it's always magenta. luckily epson offers free two day shipping so i'll be back to printing in no time, and if i do a little bit every day it should be done within a week. there's so much i want to make, and so little time...
today i finished watching kamen rider faiz with friends! it was... interesting, to say the least. the pacing is all over the place. i feel like nothing happens for the whole first half of the series, then it picks up, then everything gets thrown at you in the last 10 eps. it had some interesting concepts, but there's a lot of lost plot points that never go anywhere. still fun though, especially when we all shitpost about the characters! we also watched pulse, a 2001 japanese horror film that was legitimately a little spooky but i think i need to watch it again because the ones we found online definitely had some missing scenes. oh, i also caught up with dandadan! i'm sad there's no more episodes to watch and we're gonna go on a weekly schedule now, but it'll give me something to look forward to. we need to watch the new panty and stocking season too, but it's not on crunchyroll sadly... i still can't believe how long it's been, the series originally came out when i was still in high school.
melancholy came to visit me again, but i feel a little bit better now after preparing some cards for pen pals. i was thinking about how i've spent the last 5 years creating and deepening a lot of connections instead of investing in myself, and how many of those friends have disappeared now. does this mean it was all for nothing? i don't know... all i know is that i had fun together with everyone. maybe i'm just thinking about lost friends because my bf recently found out one of his online friends passed away from cancer in may. actually, i think i should write about this more in a physical journal, i'm going to turn the unicorn journal i was gifted into one part diary, one part junk journal. usually i have trouble maintaining a physical diary, but those were all writing only, no decorating! decorating makes everything fun. ah, i haven't heard from the friend who got me this journal in a while...
lately i've been passing out after work and waking up after it's already too late to ride my bike. i don't understand why because i don't really do anything that warrants being this tired, at least i don't think so... i blame the heat. it's miserable and my mind is already in autumn mode. we drove by spirit halloween on our way to get an 11pm dark raven frosty and i can't wait to go, i'll probably wait until after the con in a couple of weeks.
i ordered stickers this morning too! now all that's left is for me to prep my homemade sticker stash and my commission examples. i don't feel ready at all... i was looking at the expenses and this con is so expensive for a home con! i couldn't believe it and really regret not splitting my table, but it's too late for that now... i can only think of one person i could hit up this late in the game and i already decided to never table with her again after how rude she was last time. with how big the alley is and my location, i just don't feel confident i'll be able to meet my goal. i never found a solution for the wifi either so i'm just going to have to chance it with offline payments and maybe purchase wifi on saturday only. surely any potential declines would cost me less than $80 a day but i guess i'm gonna find out...
my grandpa caught the rat! just a few days after i discovered it, he left the trapped creature at my doorstep as if it were a trophy, lmfao. i'm hoping it was an outlier, and there's no other signs of others yet... fingers crossed. these cats didn't lift a paw though! you're all fired!
oh yes, i finally dusted all of the figures laying on my shelf! it was a big undertaking and took maybe 4 hours. when i clean my collection, i completely take everyone apart and dust and wipe them individually so it takes a long time. i think maybe if i worked a whole day from sun up to sun down, i could clean and reorganize my entire collection but i run out of steam on one task easily and prefer to work a little bit on multiple tasks so i don't get bored. all of my boxed up figures still need to be dusted, but it's progress! really, this is all stuff i should have done half a year ago... but my energy was being leeched when we first moved in and i feel we just barely feel recovered now.
on that note, i noticed so many tiny damages on a lot of my figures while i was cleaning them... for a long time, things like that really bothered me and i wanted things to remain like new for as long as possible. but now i just think... it's a privilege to care for a collection and no matter the condition, these belongings are mine. i only buy what i actually like, so condition is something i don't have to fuss over too much. anyway, here's my robbie collection! i'm only missing the blue robbie nendo and the two sweet factory edition mini robbies now.
right now i'm waiting for my bus, i forgot it's hourly on the weekends so i get to sit here and bake for an hour in the 100+ degree weather. i'm so cranky and thirsty and tired and i just wanna go home. i don't even think i'll ride my bike tonight.
the last birthday card safely arrived to its rightful home, which means i officially survived the july birthday onslaught! the total count? 18. eighteen birthdays. of course i didn't celebrate all of those, that's just how many ended up popping up throughout the month, but i did celebrate a few and sent cards to a few others. busy, busy month!
the con is so close, my supplies have gradually been coming in and i ordered prints yesterday. i haven't tabled at a con like this in two years, so i had the perfect amount of art stockpiled for my print budget. realistically, my prints are just filler because my stickers and commissions sell better. man, stickers are so expensive these days! it's good for business but i always have to mask my shock when i see people pay $20-30 just for a handful of stickers at my day job. i remember when a single sticker used to be a dollar and now it's more like $4-6 depending on the size and material...
i actually need to order stickers too but that'll have to wait until next paycheck and if it comes down to it, i can simply print everything at home although it'll be on paper and not a more durable material. oh, i also finally bought aesprite yesterday! i've been making pixel art in primarily ms paint this whole time, it's just what i'm used to. old habits die hard, i guess.
yesterday my plans were to make some new buttons for me and my friends but the day ended up getting away from me. my friend livestreamed herself cooking an ember watermelon and it was incredible and horrific all at once. i randomly remembered that video one day and shared it and we all lost our minds at the absurdity, then my friend offered to actually cook it on stream to celebrate the arrival of her new tripod. did she like it? was it good? spoiler: no lmao
last week my manager came back from vacation and talked to me about the situation we're in and how our bosses don't properly communicate with us. she's the hardest worker i know, originally we were both just regular workers when she got hired years ago. her husband also works with us so naturally she got a job too, eventually getting promoted to manager during our relocation, but honestly i still feel we are equal, maybe it's just how small we are... we're tiny, like less than 20 employees tiny. anyway, i found out that "assistant" my bosses hired is actually supposed to be the operations manager, which was not communicated clearly to us. oh ok, so you're going to hire someone completely different and who doesn't know or understand the company and its daily operations instead of promoting the person who has poured her heart and soul into your business? completely sideline her? she was so upset, there was nothing we could do but reassure each other because at the end of the day these aren't our decisions. she told me "when i found out, i cried. but don't worry, i will take care of us. i know we have bills to pay and we don't get paid enough. [our boss] doesn't understand" in regards to store hours and my boss's decision to hire a fourth person for the store. it's just so infuriating... i'm disappointed but not surprised. really i should be looking for somewhere else to work but my options are very limited.
what else... oh, we went back to the pool last week, the one with the diving board! i wanted to force myself to be brave and try it so i did and it was fun! i just jumped in, not a proper dive... but at least i can say i did it. i'm sure the lifeguard saw my hesitation since she gave me a reassuring thumbs up as i was swimming back towards the stairs. how do those kids do all those flips and stuff?? they're so adventurous. truth be told, my chest was actually a little sore from the impact of the water after! is that normal, or is my body just old and tired?
bean is feeling better now too!! she was lethargic and didn't eat for three days straight which had us all really worried, but she went for a check up at the vet and all of her labs came back normal, though she did have a bit of a fever so they gave her some medication. she's already crying for food again and hobbling around on her three legs! she's so cute. i'm glad you're feeling better bean. she hangs out on my bed when her mama isn't home.
now for something disgusting... the other night while having a watch party with a friend, i went to get cucumbers from the fridge and as soon as i turned on the light, there was a rat in the burners of our stove!! it fled as soon as it saw me into the stove where nothing could reach it. i was so shocked i knocked on my sister's door and woke her up just to tell her what had happened. i keep the kitchen as clean as i can!! why do we have pest problems again?! that explains what was happening to the bananas too, it was a rat nibbling on them! these cats better get to work...
oh boy, i had a crazy weekend! on friday there was an ozzy tribute show i wanted to go to, so i decided to go right after work. my friend's wife is actually a big ozzy fan too and has dressed as him before so she was kind enough to come pick me up on her motorcycle. she actually repairs bikes and stuff for a living, she's so cool! it was my first time riding on a motorcycle, so i was terrified, especially on the highway. it's not that i didn't trust her, especially because she's been riding her whole life, i'm just anxious like that. but somewhere along the ride, as we were making our way to the show on the highway, i realized that this is what it's like to ride with travis on schpeltiger or with sylus and it helped me calm down. it's so autistic lmao, but hey if it works, it works right?
after that, i really enjoyed the ride. the wind felt SO GOOD, it was actually cool despite how hot it was that day! feeling all the elements all around you is actually very exhilarating and at that moment i really understood just why she's so passionate about bikes. once we finally arrived at the venue, the line was crazy! we met up with another friend who i wanted to invite out more often and then... we couldn't get into the show, lmao! i didn't know you couldn't pay at the door, i tried to rsvp but there were no more tickets available. i wish they had made this more clear on their advertising for the event.
i felt so bad about wasting their time, so we went to the bar across the street and i bought them both a drink. we ended up just shooting the shit and talking about personal stuff for a couple of hours, until midnight. those are the kind of conversations i live for. please, skip the stiff pleasantries and tell me the deep shit about you... i will listen with great enthusiasm, promise.
something terribly awkward also happened... my old best friend suddenly entered the area we were at. i won't go into detail about our friendship or all the events that built up to my decision to distance myself from her, but let's just say towards the end i felt more like her keeper and not her friend... and men were always a priority over me. anyway, she started crying when she saw me and complimented me endlessly and told me that she missed me over and over. i asked her if she was drunk and she said she wasn't, but i could tell she was because she went into one of her verbal loops.
i'm really glad she wasn't alone, luckily she always has a lot of kind people looking out for her so i wasn't worried when it was time for her to be scooped up and go. it was... intense and brought back a lot of painful, familiar memories, having to calm her down again. so yeah, the night was insane and kind of a failure and i still feel bad for wasting everyone's time, but i really did enjoy myself! i wore my sabbath shirt... it's so old and tattered, it has tiny holes all over but i can't bear to throw it out because it's one of my favorite shirts. actually, i feel like i had another sabbath shirt at one point but maybe my mom threw it out? i do remember she unironically called judas priest "the devil's music" when i told her they were my favorite band when i was 16, lmao.
on saturday, i wanted to go to the oddities and curiosities expo before work, but my grandpa needed a ride to the store to get a new car battery so i stuck with my original decision to go on sunday. now his car is running again, just poorly... at least he can make those short, essential trips again though.
complaining about work now... right after we went to the store, i had to leave for work. if there's something i hate more than closing or working on a saturday, it's closing on a saturday! it gets way too damn chaotic. work on friday was super stressful and a disaster for reasons i won't get into, but saturday pissed me off too. first, i found out my boss IS hiring another person for the shop which made me so angry for the whole weekend. when they hired my co-worker that replaced the one who just left, they hired her on too early and both my old co-worker and i expressed this because our hours had been badly cut thanks to how much we had to divide store hours among four people. we've always been fine with just three people and cross-training some of the other workers in a pinch. i really don't want to have to get a third job.
second, my bosses recently hired an assistant and it's taking a while for her to learn everything. while i did need help checking people in, more often she would need my help with something or make things less efficient for me. the worst thing though was at the end of the night when she left. i said "oh, but we still have to close! the money and clean up!" and she simply stated she was here to help and that's it and had me unlock the door for her so she could go home. i thought that was SO damn rude! even my boss will help me close or count the money on nights he's here. another thing lady, just because you don't understand something doesn't mean there's "no rhyme or reason" for it. it was so irritating.
finally, yesterday i dressed up and went to the oddities and curiosities expo yesterday. it was their first time in my city, usually they go to the capital. i wore iron gate! my old chunky gothic shoes completely fell apart, so i didn't wear it for the longest time but my regular tuk mjs worked just fine. it was fun! i mainly just wanted to walk around and see what was up, unsurprisingly there were a lot of the same things that we sell at my work so i didn't take many pictures at all.
they had a class for $150 where you could learn taxidermy and take home what you made which i thought was super cool, i definitely would have signed up if i could have. i also would have loved to get a preserved snake in a globe or a tarantula or scorpion frame, but that's just not in the budget right now. i bought a souvenir magnet just to remember i went, and some stickers. the tunes were great at least! it was all music i love.
after the expo, i wanted to go to the pool but i ended up being too tired... we came back home and knocked out. i don't get it, why was i so tired? i only walked around for a couple of hours. maybe it was just because of a stressful weekend in general. i have a couple of weekdays off next week so we're going back to the pool then instead, i'm sure it'll mean less people too. grandpa is doing a lot better now by the way! but now my sister's cat is sick... i'm really hoping that she was simply depressed because my sister wasn't here (my mom actually got after her for this and even said she should give her room to me because she's never home omg) but if she doesn't perk up now that my sister is back home from another trip, she's gonna have to go to the vet. poor baby... she's just not herself. she's not eating, grooming, crying, or even wants to go outside like she usually does. we're all really worried.
